For most of my adult life I have been putting my own wants or needs on the back burner in order to take care of my husband, my son, or even friends. I used to think well, it's only temporary. I'm only temporarily waiting to start my own business or to go back to school because my son was little or my husband's career was more important than my own. My son starts University in September this year so the waiting will have to hold on for at least another four years. This is an important four years for my son and my whole family so the wait is worth it.
As for my career, I've created this holding pattern all on my own. I could have started a new career or went back to school at any time. Sure it would have taken longer to go back to college while my son was little but does that really matter in the long run? I once read an inspirational article a long time ago about an 80 year old woman that went back to university for her doctorate. When she was asked why she did so at that age she said "well, I was going to turn 80 years old anyway whether I went back to school or not!" So I guess 47 really isn't that old to start over after all. I am still thinking about going back to school lately. I'm just not sure what field to go into or where to put my all my energy next. It's a big decision that will cost a ton of money if I do go forward with it.
In the past I have always put all my energy and talent into other people's businesses. When I worked in retail, I put all my time and energy into selling or merchandising for huge companies. When I wrote movie reviews, I did it for a larger website instead of my own at first. And even recently I put my sewing talent to use for someone else's business. That's enough of that! It's time for me to start doing things for myself. If I only put in half that energy on my own business as I did for all those other people I would be very successful by now. Why is it so much easier for me to do things for other people instead of myself?
It's time to stop waiting on my ship to just show up. If I want it, I have to go and get it. It's time to step into my own life fully. To enjoy everything that comes along. To jump in with both feet so I'm not waiting and wanting something else. Something bigger and better will come if I just step up to the task!
I was 36 when I finally went back to college. Both my exes had bachelor's degrees, as does my current (and final) spouse. I was lucky enough to actually get a job in the financial aid office at the local state university, so I was able to get my degree while working there full-time for only $3.00 US per term! I then continued and got my master's degree for the same amount. Yes, it took me four years to do each one (and I had enough community college units to start as a junior, so it took me ten years total), but I did it, while working full-time AND raising a family.
ReplyDeleteThese days you're fortunate to have more online classes available than I did when I started. You might think about checking out the online courses in various schools for majors that you are or might be interested in. You didn't mention if you've already had some college, but if you don't have all your general education courses done, you can always start with those and explore majors in the process.
I wish you the best of luck in this, and I agree, it's time to get on board YOUR ship, not just watch others' ships come in and out of port.
I have an Associates degree (2year) in Business and Fashion Merchandising. I did that right out of high school and then went to work for some large department stores in the US doing fashion merchandising. My biggest problem is that sort of job no longer exists. I am a dinosaur in the retail world. It has changed dramatically over the years. The wages have gotten lower while the hours get longer. It's just not where I want to be anymore unless I own my own store. I haven't figured out if I want to go back to school for a completely different career or invest in my own business. I am leaning towards my own business right now.
ReplyDeleteOne place you might want to explore is a website called FutureLearn. They offer free online classes in lots of different subjects, but you can also connect with them for university credit, at least for some courses, as the classes are offered by various universities in the UK and Europe. And they have classes for people trying to start their own business, so I highly recommend that you check them out!
DeleteThank you! I definitely will check it out.
DeleteDo what makes you happy and what is best for your family, Mary. You have my support.
ReplyDeleteThanks Sylvie. :)
DeleteGoing back to school isn't an easy decision and if you've been thinking about it a lot, then this might be the Gods or universe telling you it is time, just the same as any other endeavor. Whatever you choose to do, just know that myself along with everyone else who follows your blog will support you and rally you on! *hugs* Best of luck!
ReplyDeleteThanks Hannah. :)
DeleteI relate to this, I have been in a holding pattern for so long now - partly of my own doing. There's always some fear behind it, and I'm thrilled to hear you are pushing past it and taking/doing what you deserve!
ReplyDeleteThank you. I have been taking some classes on self improvement lately. I guess I never realized just how much I put my own wishes last until this class opened my eyes to it. It's been like therapy for me. I think I'm just finally stopping for a minute to reassess what I have Ben doing for the past 25 years or so. Lol.
DeleteI'm not sure you have this where you are -- you might because where you are is so much more supportive in many ways then the US -- but you can take business classes for starting your own business. We have a government sponsored program that helps small businesses start. They cover business plans, financial/funding plans, taxes, etc. and how to apply for grants to do all of this. A program like this will get you up-to-date on current best business practices and test to see if you really want to start you're own business. This program is only a few months long and it's free. Maybe there's something like that by you?
ReplyDeleteYou know that I think higher education at any age is a good thing. Some of my best students have been those returning to the classroom after having their kids and supporting others in their careers. These students are hungry and happy to be in the classroom learning.
That is an excellent suggestion. I'm sure those type of classes would help me get organized and sure of what I'm doing.
DeleteWhy wait until everyone else is finsihed until you are allowed to start becoming more you?
ReplyDeleteExactly! So crazy.
DeleteHugs! When you work out what you want to do, do it! It's time for YOU!
ReplyDelete